"Sugar-Coated Snot Pops For Kids!"

BLACK SNOT

up at dawn in Paddington
to a cloudless sky, but I couldn’t see the sun
was nearly struck by a motorcar
when I crossed the street to the underground

I should have hopped on Bakerloo
which name? which color? I couldn’t choose

I got my el map, had to mind the gap
and when I got back I had black, BLACK SNOT
this transportation is cheap, but it comes with a price
and that’s a lot of the your black, BLACK SNOT

at the Sussex Pub we met some mates,
played billiards, and had shepherd’s pie
we hit the London Dungeon for a while,
then saw some popsters called the Wannadies

but tired and broke on the East End of town
were we safe out late on the underground?

from Portobello to Camden Town
we added treasure to our holiday
but Circle Line was closed Sunday
couldn’t reach Victoria to catch the plane . . .


INVINCIBLE VINCENT

Vincent rode his ten-speed into our neighborhood
he came here to protect us, and to teach us to be good
two feet taller, eight years older
thick were his glasses and broad were his shoulders

on summer nights he’d drive us into town in his Volkswagon
karate kicked a switch blade from little Newton’s hand
pinball machines, suicide sodi
Jaws at the theatre and at the drive-in movie

no one can knock down INVINCIBLE VINCENT
his brain is really big INVINCIBLE VINCENT
he’ll beat you at chess INVINCIBLE VINCENT
you’ll never outsmart INVINCIBLE VINCENT
tougher than your dad INVINCIBLE VINCENT
still never brags INVINCIBLE VINCENT
he’s a nice guy INVINCIBLE VINCENT
cool as Vince Lombardi INVINCIBLE VINCENT


HANGING OUT WITH DANZIG

my mother woke me up & said, “Matt, today you’ll not ride the bus
because there’s someone special coming over to pick you up”
I slipped on my sneakers, gave me mum a kiss
then his black rod pulled in, license number six-six-six

HANGING OUT WITH DANZIG

my friend, Eric e-mailed all the way from Germany
and wrote that Eerie Von was somewhere in his family tree
but the next week he phoned his voice shook with a frenzy
it seems their local paper had printed an article on me
for...

HANGING OUT WITH DANZIG

It raised my social status
and international appeal
it’s like hanging with a superhero
only Danzig is real

the band at our homecoming asked Danzig to step in
kids twisted to “killer wolf” ‘til he crushed the mic in his hand
he said, “My regrets for that Shure 58,
but now I must go meditate and henceforth lift weights”

HANGING OUT WITH DANZIG

In that modern man in black
lies a heart of gold
he’d sell his soul for a friend
had it not been already sold


THE NIGHT WE GOT SICK & DIED

the rose that I placed in your hair
turned to black for lack of air
‘twas a beautiful night outside
what a lovely evening to die

little did I know we would never go home
little did I know we would never go home
your breath smelled of formaldehyde

THE NIGHT THAT WE GOT SICK
THE NIGHT THAT WE GOT SICK
THE NIGHT THAT WE GOT SICK AND DIED

and in the garden of faster food
we dined without a clue
sirens came singing on the wind
and settled on our pallid skin

little did we know where it all came from
still we ate it up ‘til the very last crum
our hunger did finally subside

we’re not Romeo & Juliet, y’know
we just turned onto the wrong road
and tossed a blanket out on Times Beach
now was it just love that made us weak?

little did we know it would end like this
little did we know it was our last kiss
we took a quick ambulance ride


SCREAMALONG SONG

scream, yeah, along with the band
give attention to the words or you won’t understand
take a piece of your heart and stick it in your diaphragm
scream along, scream a song, scream along with the band

now how the world was made, I just don’t know
I didn’t exist a billion years ago
but I wrote this song with a vegetable
it took a minute to eat, but a season to grow, go

now if you have a cold you might sing like snot
then when you rock’n’roll you’ll be much too hot
but everything is okay just let your blood boil hot
you got the cure, just scream along with the band, mam


DO THE JUMP

all the guys are so so sappy
all the girls get blue
but all my friends are wound up happy
ants are in their shoes

they DO THE JUMP
DO THE JUMP
DO THE JUMP
DO THE JUMP, jump
you’re jumping around

pretend your walking on the moon
you’re 1/6th your own weight
catapult into the air
and hit your head on space

gravity’s a heavy deal
but you can turn it around
your legs are full of rocket fuel
they get you off the ground

sisters leaping for green branches
fall down in the shade
all the apples smile and wink
‘cause everything’s okay


LET ME PUNCH OUT YOUR LIGHTS

it’s a family bar-b-que
you’re screaming at me--I’m looking through you
sunny days and lemonade
and all those battle scars we made

there are fireworks on the 4th of July
your forehead sweats and you draw green flies
swimming pools and ice cold tea
and floating in contaminated chlorine

but baby, I really don’t wanna fight
only if you LET ME PUNCH OUT YOUR LIGHTS
I’ll give you first dibs - give you back one of your ribs
please please me and LET ME PUNCH OUT YOUR LIGHTS

now baby, you’re the best, I love you the most
but I like you better tied around a post
let me build a fire, give your head TV
you’re an ornament on my Christmas tree

but baby, I really don’t wanna fight
only if you LET ME PUNCH OUT YOUR LIGHTS
don’t want to kill you dead - just want to punch your head
let’s settle our differences right and LET ME PUNCH OUT YOUR LIGHTS


GIRLS & GOBLINS

you thought you had the best of them, their hero to the end
but from the ink and paper, my life was on the mend
just young minds to fill with imagination and thrills
they needed you, they needed me, too

I could be a little crazy, or be your best friend
with pumpkin bombs and a jet sled, I glided on the wind
remember that day, it was only Gwen and you
and I flew between the two of you

GIRLS & GOBLINS all die

now tell me what’s your hang up, now why should you care
for a neighborhood that was never kind, and for our kind was never there

the warehouse was closed, still I manufactured a treat
it’s a welcome back bash to knock you off your feet
see you next panel, see you next page
the drama unfolds centerstage


HOUSE OF THE ANTS

there’s nowhere to run to, nowhere to hide
invade your space, that place where you reside
refuse to surrender, refuse to use the door
they creep in through the walls, crawl out from under the floor

HOUSE OF THE ANTS

invite some friends for dinner, but closely watch their hair
you’ll find a tint of red, that previously was not there
evading modern weapons, some scouts are in your sink
better call your congressman, warm up the tanks that think

it starts with one, soon its one thousand
thought you had privacy, well think again
we’re putting on our goggles, we’re walking outside
and hills of sand shroud us from behind


SUMMER BLOWS

SUMMER BLOWS
I got no muscles and no summer clothes
got a broken a.c. hanging out my broken window

frowning folks
working in the sun and having strokes
rake and bake and make sure the lawn is mowed

summer blows
they’re cranking K-Shit on the stereo
when the keg goes dry, some thirsty guy will start a fight

a summer feast
is a feast which I can’t stand in the least
a pig’s head on a stake doesn’t whet my appetite

SUMMER BLOWS, so I’m leaving my home tonight

summer time is not a time for aquaphobia
how did I get this way? I gotta get to the shade
before I pass out or throw up

my head is spinning, the flies are buzzing down
I was born in the wrong place, made the wrong way
in a stupid one-horse town

nothing’s cool
pale and sweating by the toilet stool
can’t escape this heat, yeah, SUMMER completely BLOWS

bugs and bites
yeah, they won the bottle rocket fight
I sprayed my girl, but she was sick up half the night


HEADLESS

Chairface
writes his name on the moon
mansion on the top of the hill
a flashy birthday party, toooooo

if you’re evil, you’re invited
the invitation read
bring a gift for the crime boss
with a chair for a head
what’s the city going to do?

he’s all HEADLESS
yeah, HEADLESS
very HEADLESS
sans head--what a mess!


yeah, HEADLESS
simply HEADLESS
when they’re HEADLESS
you can’t look evil in the face!

diamonds, aren’t quite his thing
but a flashlight magnified
can make a villain sing

high heels are flying
stopping them dead
the little moth is trying
and he’s using his head
but where’s our hero, where’s the man in blue?
spoooooon!



All lyrics by M. Meyer c 1998 IBC Shadows Music